|Beckah:||also no one talks about the jefferson/adams love/hate affair thing|
|Jackai:||Except maybe Buchanan|
|Jackai:||"I wish William were here too. It's so nice you have each other."|
|Beckah:||Seriously adams? Thomas jefferson survives?|
|Beckah:||and then die with a smile|
|Jackai:||Can we please just talk about how I've made James Buchanan our Sassy Gay President?|
|Jackai:||I heard about you and Joshua Speed, Abraham.|
|Jackai:||There's no shame here.|
|Jackai:||This is a safe frame.|
|Jackai:||And Lincoln would be like, "WE WERE JUST FRIENDS. IT WAS NORMAL FOR MEN TO SHARE BEDS. FRIENDS."|
|Jackai:||"Yes, darling. William and I were roommates. I understand the need for discretion. But, Abraham, we are dead."|
|Jackai:||"It's time to let go."|
|Jackai:||"He's repealed DADT."|
|Jackai:||"It's okay now."|
|Jackai:||And Lincoln is like, "I think this is what a stroke feels like. In what's left of my brains."|
|Jackai:||Ronald Reagan would just eat his jellybeans and everyone would just wait for him to blow a gasket.|
|Jackai:||And he's like, "I'm not saying shit, one of you fuckers has got my old westerns on film."|
|Beckah:||when the house catches on fire|
|Beckah:||the portraits are like|
|Beckah:||get me the fuck out of here boy|
|Beckah:||or so help me my childrens children will come after you|
|Jackai:||OH MY GOD|
|Jackai:||DOLLEY MADISON IS LIKE|
|Jackai:||"DON'T WORRY MOTHERFUCKERS I GOTS YOU"|
|Beckah:||and they're like|
|Beckah:||man up dude|
|Beckah:||your girl saved us|
|Jackai:||LOL LOVE IT|
|Beckah:||your girl is better than you|
|Jackai:||Madison is like I WROTE YOU A MOTHERFUCKING CONSTITUTION|
|Jackai:||And everyone is like, "YEAH, JAMES, THANKS FOR YOU. FUCKER."|
|Beckah:||YEAH WELL YOU SUCK WHEN THERE IS A FIRE AROUND BITCH|
|Beckah:||YOU HAVE A POODLE THING OBAMA?|
|Beckah:||I HAD SOME FUCKING ALLIGATORS ALRIGHT?|
|Beckah:||YOU COME TALK TO ME WHEN YOU HAVE AN ALLIGATOR|
|Jackai:||GWB would be like HEY. IT'S RESPECTABLE.|
|Beckah:||NO YOU KNWO WHAT IS RESPECTABLE? A LION|
|Beckah:||FUCK YOUR ALLIGATORS|
|Beckah:||I HAD A LION MOTHERFUCKERS|
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